Dearest Cell Phone:

I am so grateful for you. Yes I have dropped you down concrete stairs, on the ground, out of the car, in the store, and worst of all in the toilet. Yes Kenzie talks to you, wants you, kisses you, licks you, sits on you, and drops you (just like her mom). Yes, I tell you how dumb you are when you DROP my calls and think that sometimes I want to purposely throw you on the ground. But alas, You are smarter than me, you have a built in, never forgets, memory! How would I survive day light savings time without you! Thank you for the reminder and polite way you change the time without tell me how dumb I am!

~Love, Your abusive owner :)